What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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a man with a serious lung diesease was brought into a hospital, through continuous care they were not able to save him and he died the following morning.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

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Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Jimmy Saville

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

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Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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