There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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there were 2 black men and a mexican man in a car. who as driving? we cant tell from the problem but is is more likely it is a black guy because there are 2 of him and 1 mexican.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops