A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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