What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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i like turtles

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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9/11

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

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Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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