Get up Look in the mirror

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

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Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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Sir, your wife is dead

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops