Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

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jeffrey: Do you know what happened on the 5th of november? gerald: No jeffrey: I cant remember

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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