What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops