Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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