Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

jews

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

Why did Gavin kill Harley. Because his voices told him to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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