How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

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The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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How many skilled union workers does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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everyone wonders y grandmas dont wear bra's its because if youre that old u might die putting it on

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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