How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

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A man walks into a bard with a politician, an Asian man, and a sailor. They all get drinks and have a good time.

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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