roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

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Why did the gitl fail her cooking class? Because she was abused and severely beaten by her teacher

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

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Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

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Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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