why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

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what happens when you wake up inception

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I like your hair

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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