What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

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What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops