Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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