What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

I had friends on the Death Star.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Justin's life

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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