what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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420

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What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

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Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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