Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

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Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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