Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

thumb_up thumb_down +28

wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I'm funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your mother is so fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The white guy did it!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops