How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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