Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

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What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, now that i think of it, roses come in many colors And violets are actually violet in color, thus the name

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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Why did the Asian Kid pass his test? He studied hard.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

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Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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A whole 'nother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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