Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

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why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing because he was black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops