Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy almost unparalleled in marine history.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the racist southerner say to the snide lawyer? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops