One night a man layed on his bed and looked into the skies, then he realizes: WHERE THE HELL IS MY CEILING!?!?!

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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a man jumps of a cliff and ..... hits the ground

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fun fact for the day: 100% of people that drink water die sooner or later

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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Heyy everyone text this number 320-510-3277 Kay ask him why he poops the bed at age 17 .. His name is mike geier.. Haha

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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how would you feel when your girlfriend dumps you really bad because she just dumped you man!!!1

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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Two black guys are seen running out of a convenient store. They've just received word that two planes crashed into the twin towers, both their sons worked maintenance on the 73rd floor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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