What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

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Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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I have suicidal thoughts

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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