How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Roses are red Olives are Black come to my and will smoke some crack

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, We're doing it backwards, That's what she said.

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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What do you call five black guys surrounding one white guy who bosses them around? Whatever his name is.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

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What is a Mexicans favorite sport? Tennis.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

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Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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Why was the man crying? He has aids.

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Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

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What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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