" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

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Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

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how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

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Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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How do you get pikachu onto a bus? You can't. Pikachu is a fictional creature and therefore does not exist.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

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Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

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Why did the pedophile skip breakfast? He said that he would grab a little something on the way to work...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops