what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

Women's rights

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

http://www.com/

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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