How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

yada yada

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

Why did the owl visit the hospital? His mom was dying of luekemia.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

What did the man order at KFC, in Miami? A face.

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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