The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because numbers, like people, are afraid of all things bigger than themselves

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Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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your mammas so fat tha-- my mother is dead. oh... sorry.

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This winter: "The seal is broken, as the spirits of hell go across the world, I can help you find them Clint! But only you can prevent them from killing your family!" "I will do whatever I must!" "Be careful, you can only see them with medication sample X, and destroy them with the super addictive Meladocs 5" "HOW DO I KILL THEM! I CANNOT HANDLE MORE MELADOCS 5! ITS ADDICTIVE AS HELL!" "Only you can save us Clint, only you can do this until their world malfunctions saving us all, but killing you in the process!" "I WILL... I CAN!... UGH... HOW MUCH LONGEEEEEEEEEEEEER!" THE PACKMAN: THE MOVIE.

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

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In mediavel times :A Jew rapes his mom.... He is promptly taken out of society and thrown into a lions den due to his act of imortality.

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What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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