Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

Miami Heat.

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

I'm getting tired of nazi jokes. ANNE FRANKly I'm quite offended

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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