You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

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What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops