Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -21

your mom is so fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

if your mother was put in a situation where she could either have sex with a man or a woman she would pick the woman

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock-knock. There is no reply. The burglar makes sure no one is home and breaks into a side window. After stealing some precious jewelry and family valuables, he exits through the same window.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

thumb_up thumb_down -23

mitchell palmer sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops