Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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Why didn't junior say thank you for his christmas present from his dad? He was raised by two moms

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You know what happens when you assume right? Well, you make an educated guess based on prior knowledge to the circumstance at hand.

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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what's black? a lot of things.

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops