Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

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mitchell palmer sucks

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A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

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what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

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An English Grammar Expert writes a very intelligent essay.

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a gun.

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How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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