your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

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Jackass! I was one of the central leaders of the fucking "old" underworld network, while you just scraped together whoever was left when the shit hit the ceiling and called it all yours! And stop trying to flatter yourself, your methods are an insult to everyone that knows what methods you are using, and probably every fucking else, charm is one thing, acting like a total queerfag is another. Lets see what the money you claim I will be receiving will do for me, as your goddamn "experts" "followers" are the ones that sliced my fucking eyeball almost in half, and if you had no idea, eyes are pretty much like fucking raw egg inside, so its not much to do about it. Listen, I know your fucking "order", its not Scientology, and its not FUCKING NERONISM! IF YOU ARE GOING TO CALL IT FOR WHAT IT IS YOU DO THAT! MY NAME IS NERO, ITS NOT AN ALIAS, ITS NOT A NICKNAME NOR SOME FUCKING "CYBER IDENTITY" So you better make sure that money arrives soon enough, or I will reveal the name of your "order", the locations and whatever members I know to the public, and you know I do not fucking mean those worthless queers you sent or did not send to harass me. And you know I do not mean here on fucking horsehead network, Ill start a fucking torrent on the piratebay, and share every fucking secret left, and you can bet there will be nowhere for your "high and mighty" ass to hide. Listen, My name is Nero, your name is "Axel Knight" (Or so you claim, if I where you, I would be hiding in shame too!) SO HOW THE HELL DOES IT MAKE ANY SENSE THAT YOUR "ORDER" IS SUPPOSEDLY CALLED THE ORDER OF NERO?

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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Todd is offered a pizza, chinese food, and a sandwich. he then kills himself because options trigger a psychological disorder that was diagnosed to him as a child

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What did the black man do after the white guy told a racist joke? Laugh

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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The GOV and the WHO?

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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Lil Wayne's rapping career

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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whats up and also down? your mum

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

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[Set up] [No punch line]

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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