How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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123457

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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69.9

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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