A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

You.

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

A fat man on a moped

why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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