What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

c======3

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb. One

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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