Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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why did the baby fall out of the crib? it was dead

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how does wasabi stay open during summer because tiffany is a nice person

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There's now a sandwich named after Jerry Sandusky, it's got 60 year old meat stuffed between buns barely out of the oven.

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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What do you call your mom? Mom

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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womens rights

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What happened to the convict on death row? He died

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, someone keeps shitting in my garden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops