Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

thumb_up thumb_down

here kitty kitty

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops