Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

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what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

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Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

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whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

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why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

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Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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