Dear Reader I am writing to express my complete and utter disdain toward the subject of your face. Rarely have I to witness such a repugnant sight. I would like to inform you that, upon most regrettably witnessing your face, my delicate stomach muscles gave way, and my morning meal, of lightly buttered Kipper and freshly squeezed orange juice most unfortunately ended up in one of the seventeen human waste disposal outlets to adorn my manor house. I struggle to comprehend how you, being such a selfish sadist, are able to live with yourself, knowing how much dismay you have caused me. Might I suggest that you pay a visit to a prosthetic plastic surgeon, in order to prevent other innocent's to suffer as did I. I request politely, but please be firmly assured in the knowledge that I will complain to the magnificent force of the police should you not comply with my reasonable request. Your face simply can not be allowed to exist in it's current form. I would go so far to say that it may be a danger to the elder's of our society, with their regrettably weak hearts.

Person One: Knock Knock Person Two: Whos there? Person One: You can see its obviously me because theres not really a door there.

Want to here a joke? Me to...

what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

I have sexdaily. Sorry I mean dyslexia.

I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

Q.what happens if a fat man see's a black man? A. the fat man eats the black man thinking that he was chocolate

What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...