Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

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One time at band camp.............that's it........

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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Why did the gitl fail her cooking class? Because she was abused and severely beaten by her teacher

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Two muffins are in an oven. They don't speak to each other because muffins do not have the ability to make speech. After being in the oven for several minutes at 375 degrees, they are removed, left to cool, and were eaten. They were good.

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ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

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A man walked into a bar Ouch!

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adele is so fat that when shes on a plane she makes the skyfall

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How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

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What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

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What is the best game in the world? There is no answer because that would be an opinion and opinions cannont be proved or measured.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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