A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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Why did the house burn down? Obama

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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What's the difference between and train carriage and a miscarriage? You can't eat a train carriage!

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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Prostate exam > Some of these Anti Jokes

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Q: What's better than the Call Me Maybe video? A: A shot-for-shot parody of it featuring a GIMP! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFxnAITCv5o

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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what did rishi say to jess ? GOOD ONE

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What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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