Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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