To mamma so fat..............nuff said

Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

This is an anti joke

Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

A wise man once said, "I am wise".

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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