What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

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So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a blender ? A. 37 but you can try and prove me wrong

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What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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Why the boy doesn't get any birthday presents? he has cancer.

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Laugh.

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What's a word that describes someone annoying, black, starts with an N and ends with a R? Nagger

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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It says so on your cap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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how do you finish a 30000 piece puzzle you search for cheat codes

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What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops