Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

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what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

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HOW DO YOU KILL A BLACK MAN? YOU DONT

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

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What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

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As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

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Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

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why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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