"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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