Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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Water? I hardly know her.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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Vaginal secretions

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What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

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What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Yo mamma is SO fat, she is classified as fat.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A bear walks into a bar. Animal control was contacted and the bar was evacuated.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

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what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops